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Author: Lola

Sex Ed. A-Go-Go is one part ADULT sex ed. Q & A; one part go-go revue.

The brainchild of Dirty Lola, Sex Ed. A-Go-Go seeks to inspire your libido and open your mind to a world of sexual possibilities.

5 Questions For Cooper S. Beckett

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As I’ve journeyed into the world of sex ed I’ve met and learned from some amazing people. One of those people is Cooper S. Beckett. Cooper is a sex educator, a blogger, a podcaster and a planner of epic sex parties. If  his name still isn’t ringing a bell do yourself a favor and check out the Life on the Swingset podcast and blog.  They are a definite must listen for anyone considering a life of ethical non-monogamy.

Last year at Catalyst Con West I had the pleasure of hanging out with Cooper  for a while and it was refreshing to see that he was exactly as awesome as he comes across on the podcast and in print.  He is  honest, open, geeky, funny, and smart as fuck. He ticks all the boxes on my list of reasons to adore someone. I went from fan girl to friend that weekend. I liked him so much that I told him my real name. Yep.

Yesterday, Cooper’s first  book, My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory, hit the  digital bookshelves.  I was lucky enough to get an advanced copy and I honestly couldn’t put it down. As I followed Cooper’s journey into non-monogamy I came across so many moments that mirrored  my own, a few that hit way too close to home, and hope that it will all work out in the end one way or another.  This book is going to change a lot of people’s lives. Get in on the ground floor folks! One day you’ll be bragging about owning Cooper S. Beckett’s first book.

You did it!! You published your first book! Yay!! How does it feel to be published author?

It’s exciting! I can finally reach those people who don’t read blogs. And don’t listen to podcasts. Though I’ve yet to figure out how to get them to find out about the book! It’s a cool feeling, sitting with a book in your hands that you wrote. I’m intensely proud of how this one shook out, too. Came together far better than I could’ve imagined.

In your book you say that you are “ very positively, very certainly, not cool.” You know that I always thought you were cool, and that this book pretty much solidifies your cool kid status in my book. How do you feel about that?

Well, while I certainly appreciate being called cool, I can’t allow myself to take on that title. Cool is such a funny thing, isn’t it, completely objective, and completely existing outside you. For that essay I’m definitely using cool in the traditional high school hierarchy sense, and in that sense I’m still very much not cool. Played my first Dungeons and Dragons campaign this past week, so any semblance of cool I’ve built up, I think I effectively pulled the ripcord on it. We’re the misfits and losers that Hedwig talks about, the strange and unusual of Lydia Deetz, but very certainly not cool.

My Life on the Swingset is basically a compilation of your writings from  the last five years. Who or what inspired you to finally compile your various writings and rantings into one book?

When I saw the sheer volume of words I’d put out and felt compelled (and misguided) to try something “easy” for my first book. I think it was far more difficult to compile and edit and mold the pre-existing content to work together than it would’ve been to write something new. I’ve felt for a while now that it was time to push things to the next level, and a book is the way to do it. This also allows it to act as a semi-memoir. A semoir.

Who’s bookshelves do you hope your books end up on? Did you have a particular audience in mind when you were putting the book together?

If my book is on any of the shelves of the authors whose books line my shelves I would consider it such a great honor. Just knowing that some of the luminaries in our adult sex education field (as well as my two favorite porn stars) have read and loved my book is an incredibly surreal experience. Beyond them I’ve written it to be very accessible. Since it’s in essay form, there may be 60 out of the 75 essays that you can connect with, and that’s just fine. You can skip over things that are overwhelming or scary. You can read it straight through (semoir style, I suppose) or jump around reading the essays that sound interesting. Accessibility is great, because it allows for those who are just vaguely curious about non-monogamy to pick it up without melting their face off like Toht at the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark.

What is one thing you hope people learn from reading My Life on the Swingset?

It’s not something I hope that they learn so much as something they already know that they often forget, that sex is fun. That’s my whole deal, really, that we do this thing, we play, because we enjoy it, because it’s fun. There’s no other reason to do it this way. Procreation is the one part, but if you have sex beyond that, it’s for fun. Too often that message gets lost in the din of conflict and oppression and difficulty, but it’s really what we’re doing it all for, to be appreciated, respected, and enjoy the fuck out of ourselves and others!

 

For more information and to order the book, visit My.LifeOnTheSwingset.com. For more information on the Swingset Network of podcasts and blogs, visit LifeOnTheSwingset.com.

5 Questions For Sex Cultural Revolutionary Polly Whittaker

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Have you ever met someone and instantly fallen in love with who they are and everything they stand for? Well, that’s exactly what happened when I met Polly Whittaker. She popped into the sexy shop where I work looking to speak to the owner and leave a copy of her book, Polly Sex Culture Revolutionary. The owner wasn’t in the shop that day but I was. It was kismet. Fifteen minutes and one hug later; I was dazzled by her awesomeness.  I began reading her book the next day, and I was instantly inspired. 

 I had been in dire need of a push to keep on doing what I’m doing, and it came to me in the form Polly Superstar. Polly is the type of person I’d like to be when I grow up; passionate, effervescent, and focused on making the world a better place by spreading the gospel of sex positivity and pleasure.   I am honored to be a part of her Revolutionary Blog Tour along with so many awesome sex positive people. I love sharing the amazing people I meet with all of you, and I know you’ll fall for Polly just like I did.

Follow your dreams and magic will happen.”- Polly Whittaker

 

1. You describe yourself as a 21st century sex culture revolutionary. What exactly is a sex culture revolutionary, and how can I become one?

Lola, you’re already a sex culture revolutionary! We are people who passionately believe that culture’s relationship to sex is unbalanced, and we work tirelessly to help change that. We are sex educators, porn producers, sex party hosts, bloggers, activists, comedians, and performers. The sexual revolution isn’t something that happened in the ‘60s, it’s an active part of our culture that continues to this day. The last fifty years have seen so much change, as the revolution continues to turn it needs people like us to push it forward. I believe that when we live in a society where sex isn’t shameful or wrong, people will be happier and healthier.

 

2.The main reason I created Sex Ed. A Go-Go was to spark more sex positive conversations outside of the sex positive community. What are your thoughts on this new wave of sex positive educators and activist, and what could we be doing better?

I think it’s inspiring. In a country where abstinence only sex education in schools has been the norm, independent sex educators are sometimes the only access to real information teenagers have. The internet is what has made this possible, with podcasters, youtubers and bloggers sharing their opinions and ideas. The only potential pitfall I can see is an internet-wide problem, and that’s quality control. With so many conflicting opinions it can sometimes be tough to figure out what’s true. That’s why I love what you’re doing. By creating a blog that isn’t just about sex education, but about the educators themselves, you are providing a needed service to help people vet the quality of the information they are tuning into.  

 3. What made you decide to finally chronicle your amazing life?

When I first started writing it wasn’t a memoir. It was a manual, teaching people how to throw Kinky Salons. I realized that people responded better when I told them the stories about why something was done in a particular way rather than just telling them how to do it. So I started writing the stories about all the different elements of Kinky Salon. Then one day I had writers block and I followed the advice of a friend—just write about anything to get your creativity flowing. I wrote about my father’s death. It was the most powerful thing I had ever written and I realized that this was the story that needed to be told. The real story behind the sexiness and the good times. It completely changed the direction of the book which became a much more personal story.

 

4. What do you hope to accomplish by sharing your story?

 When I wrote down my story it was really just an act of making art. I wasn’t thinking about my audience or my target market. I just needed to write, to get it out. The process of writing and editing the book was very healing. I faced some truths about myself, and my past, and made connections I never would have made without writing the book. Writing it down revealed what the book was about, not the other way around. If I can reach one person who had a similar experience, who can be comforted or inspired by reading my story, then I consider myself successful.

 

5. Who are you hoping your book reaches?

I want my book to reach people who never thought they would be able to relate to my story. I want to demystify the world I live in and break apart long held assumptions. I know that I’ve had a pretty unconventional life. My liberal parents and my artistic streak definitely give me a unique outlook, but there are some stories that are universal. Loss of a parent and heartbreak are common themes for people. We have all experienced these situations to lesser or greater degrees. I want to find the places where I connect with people more than I want to explore the differences. If my story can touch people who feel ashamed, or sad, or desperate, and help them know that there are people out there who feel the same way, then I will have achieved something meaningful and worthwhile.

  
This post is part of the Polly: Sex Culture Revolutionary Virtual Book Tour. If you make a comment in the thread below you’ll be automatically entered in a chance to WIN a LIMITED EDITION signed hardcover copy of Polly: Sex Culture Revolutionary.
The comedian Margaret Cho called it “Raw, untamed, emotional beauty–Polly is a true supernova. This memoir is as touching as it is hot, as moving as it is a masterpiece.”
Buy your copy of Polly: Sex Culture Revolutionary bit.ly/pollybook
Join Polly’s mailing list bit.ly/pollyslist
Check out Polly’s website pollysuperstar.com
Follow Polly on Twitter twitter.com/pollysuperstar
Get updates from Polly on Facebook facebook.com/itsmepolly
Click the image below to check out the other exciting stops on the tour.

 

Happy Holidays From Sex Ed. A GoGo!!!

Hello Loves!

Sex Ed. A Go-Go is taking the month of December off. Never fear, we’ll be posting another episode of our podcast this month so you’ll still get your Sex Ed. A Go-Go fix!!  We’ll be back in January with more answers to your questions and lots of shenanigans!  Until then enjoy this pic of me with Naughty Santa and get your giggle on.

Happy Holidays!!

XXOO

Lola

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My Kinky Pony!

Pink Amazon by Rebeca Puebla found on Behance.net

 

We seem to be just a wee bit obsessed with Pony Play. It came up again during this month’s show thanks to Francisco Ramirez’s fabulous equestrian outfit, and now I have pony on the brain. Don’t you want to give her a sugar cube??

Toys For Boys: P-Spot Fun

The PROvember Project is dedicated to the education and celebration of prostate health and pleasure. Yay pleasure!!!! I personally don’t have a prostate AKA p-spot, but I adore those that do. I’ve been sharing the gospel of the p-spot with the men in my life for years, so when Lucas approached me about contributing to the PROvember Project I jumped at the chance to talk about p-spot fun. Since I’m a bit of a sex toy geek I’ve decided to share a few of my favorite prostate stimulators with you, but before you begin exploring with any of these fantastic toys I suggest you check out Let’s Talk About Sex’s Male G-Spot Bible. It’s a great introduction to p-spot fun. It’s short, sweet, and to the point. I also suggest you watch the PROvember Project’s Prostate Pro-Tips videos with Lucas and Strap-On Jo. Awesome tips and valuable prostate wisdom at your finger tips. (*Giggles* Pun intended )

Now, on to the toys!!!

 

For The Beginner: Aneros Helix Syn 

The Aneros Helix Syn is the perfect toy for beginner p-spot explorers for many reasons. It’s modest size makes for easy insertion. The thick silicone coating over it’s rigid frame means you get a bit of give without loss of firmness. The silicone covered perineum massager (AKA comfort tab) adds external sensation when the Helix Syn is fully inserted and the handy little curved arm makes it easy to grip.

Pros:

  • Ergonomic design
  • Premium silicone coating
  • Flared base  (No late night toy removal trips to the ER for you!)
  • Comfort tab / perineum massager
  • Easy insertion

Cons:

  • Because it’s made with mixed materials (portions of the toy are not silicone coated) you can’t boil it to sterilize it. No sterilization means no sharing.

 

The Multitasker : Tantus Pro Touch 

With it’s “come hither” finger shape and flared base the Tantus Pro Touch can do a little bit of everything. If you’re craving sensation you can slip the included mini bullet vibe into the base of the Pro Touch and turn it into a vibrating prostate massager. When used without the mini bullet It can be slipped on to a finger and used as a manual prostate massager. Last but not least, it’s flared base makes the Pro Touch harness compatible. The perfect introduction to strap-on play.

Pros:

  • Made from 100% silicone
  • Harness compatible
  • Can also be used for g-spot play
  • Easy to clean- If you plan on sharing the Pro Touch with your partner be sure to sanitize it by boiling or bleaching it first. The Pro Touch is also dishwasher safe.

Cons:

  • Pops out easily and needs to be held in place when not using it with a strap-on
  • The mini bullet is easily switch off during play with can be frustrating if it happens at the wrong time.

 

The Luxury Item: Lelo Billy 

 

At first glance Lelo’s Billy appears to be yet another fancy lady vibe, but if you take a closer look you’ll see that it’s designed to target and stimulate the p-spot with ease. The four inch long shaft with it’s smooth, curved silicone form and ring at the base make it the ideal shape and rigidity for p-spot play. But what makes the Billy a luxury, besides it’s price, are it’s six vibration patterns with adjustable speeds. These modes are controlled by four easily detectable buttons that are located right where your fingers rest on the handle.

 

Pros: 

  • 100% Rechargeable (Charger included)
  • Extremely quiet
  • Six significantly different vibration modes
  • Powerful
  • 1 year warranty, 10 quality guarantee

Cons:

  • Expensive
  • May be too wide for anal play newbies 
  • Cannot be sterilized ( but you could always place a condom over it if you’d like to share it with your partner)

*All of the toys listed above are either 100% silicone have silicone components. Always use water based lube when using any of them. NO SILICONE LUBE!!!

Any of these toys would be a great addition to your p-spot toy box. They are all available in the PROvember Project’s P-Spot Shop along with twenty other incredible prostate toys.Have fun and remember……. Live Long and Prostate!!

Hooray for PROvember!!!!

PROvember Creator Lucas Brooks

November has become synonymous with men’s health issue awareness, mainly prostate health,  thanks to the great success of the Movember campaign. Awareness is a wonderful thing, but one has to wonder if all of those sexy mustachioed men know what to do with all that awareness. That’s where the PROvember Project comes in.  Created by the Intellectual Homosexual himself, Lucas Brooks, the PROvember Project brings education and information to the awareness party. Lucas has rounded up some of his favorite sex geeks, including yours truly, to bring you prostate tutorials, pleasure tips, toy reviews, giveaways and much more!

Check out the PROvember Project site for more information on the project. Until then, live long and prostate!! ( I totally stole that from Lucas. Sex Geeks Rule!! )

xxoo

Lola

Meet This Month’s Diva of Shimmy and Shake: Foxy Squire

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I always enjoy working with Foxy. I love seeing her costumes and I always look forward to her go-go numbers, but the best part of working with Foxy is having her big beautiful brain on display as part of the Pussy Posse.  She’s absolutely amazing. A spectacle you don’t want to miss!

After completing the burlesque class series by  Deflouered Productions, Foxy gathered her wits and talent to begin performing.  Her first performance residence was Rivers of Honey Cabaret and she was a regular performer at Matthew Silver’s Circus of Dreams and Crimson Kitty’s Cataclysm.  Her artistic skill has been shared both nationally and internationally in London, Connecticut, California, Rhode Island, Massachusetts, North Carolina, Georgia (DragonCon), Florida, Philadelphia, and NYC.   Foxy’s first headliner performance was in May 2013 at the DC Gurly Show (Washington, DC).  This year she is proud to be the first black performer for NYC’s first all female drag show, Crimson Kitty presents FAUXVASION.  Her motto is EMBRACE YOUR SPECTACLE.  Now, she shares her love for deviant art and dark beauty through burlesque.  

Catch the ever lovely Foxy Squire on stage on November 22nd at the Parkside Lounge. We’re celebrating our anniversary and what better way to do it than with this delightful diva of the shimmy and shake. 😉